Happiness Exercise Number 7

1. Second day on Zoloft. I don't know if it's a placebo effect (okay, it probably is), but I feel like I am managing my depression waay better. I know I feel sad/bad, but instead of it consuming me like it usually does, I've thought: "What are ways to fight this? How can I stay busy?" I did not have the strength to this just a few days ago. All I could do was cry

2. I'm sick, but I spent all morning sleeping away. I'm glad I did. Will probably head to bed early after taking some tylenol. My body has the chills and feels achey, my throat is sore, and my head feels sorta weird. But I am taking it easy, and being gentle with myself

3. Jonathan and Leo. Need I say more?

4. It was lovely to talk to Cheryl this morning :-)

5. He text me this morning....I was happy for that. I am trying to come to terms with how crazy I am for him, and the way he is. I am forgiving myself for this as much as I can. At this point, all I can do is pray that God will get me through this. As impossible and unbelieving as I am, I need to believe I will survive this. I will be forgiven in the end (I hope) for being so powerless and...well, stupid about someone like him. I will survive this. And I will be loved again.

6. Considering I spent most of today by myself, I did not fall into as deep a depression as I normally would. In fact, I was able to surrender to my loneliness in a non-debilitating manner. I know I feel lonely and needy easily, and it's okay. I don't need to hate myself for that, or crucify myself. I took matters into my own hands to fight the loneliness. I listened to Coffee Break French, I cleaned. I rested. I texted a few friends. It's gonna be okay.