A

in Anatomy!!!!!!

Baked Alaska

I had so much fun in Alaska that it's depressing to be back. It's easy to forget the real world on a cruise! It turned out to be miraculously better than expected...everything I wanted and needed and more! There was visual eye candy in the form of the uber cute Naturalist at the Whale watching excursion (What a cutie!), tons of food, a lovely stateroom, plenty of bonding time with mom, a little salsa dancing, even reading (for pleasure! Hooray!!!)! Reading "Angels and Demons" with mom was ridiculously fun! The ship was gorgeous...

I am starting to get my land legs back. I felt a constant swaying for the past two days, but it is starting to go away.

Gag!

It feels like I am suddenly receiving an avalanche of attention from the wrong people. Story of my life! Gag. What's cool is I met this amazing couple, (M & S), thought they were fantastic...wanted to be friends...and now the male counterpart, who is this amazing, really cool cat...is making googly eyes at BOTH me and sis. His girlfriend is a rare gem, really generous, smart, clever... It's depressing. She deserves better, and he's revealed himself to be less than ideal. Oh straight men. Where are the honorable ones? My creepy ass neighbor is trying to get a date out of me (he would try sis except I'm the cursed single one), and my gross anatomy friend is flirting with me on facebook. I told gross Anatomy friend repeatedly that if I was to get with anyone in the future, I would be the one who did the choosing. I don't desire to be chosen unless I choose that person back. Too often I am chosen by yucky guys who think that they are somehow entitled to me because they chose me. Since I am a mammal and I know how easy it is to give in out of a desire to be validated and desired, I have even turned my non-believing self to prayer, because this entire thing is so damn scary! I've prayed repeatedly for some sort of protection from Undesirables. And protection from Desirable people...who are destructive and cruel and/or just an overall bad fit for me. It feels like the prayer as worked...in keeping tantalizing prospects away from me (darn!). Now if the yucky guys would just leave me alone. I have told myself to settle for singlehood for the long haul because the idea of being in a relationship again is such an undesirable and bleak thing. Why would I want to be so vulnerable again? It's just not worth it. Ugh. Lame!