Mars, Bringer of War

So I have a lump in my right armpit. I had tried ignoring it for a week, and then applying a hot compress (after reading all sorts of articles about lumps in pits), and it has only gotten bigger and more unpleasant. For the past couple of nights I wake up and feel my right arm cramping--as if I've been pitching a ball towards someone at bat with my right arm for hours on end during the night. That this stupid lump is affecting my entire right arm--with my right hand feeling like there is not enough blood getting to it--it freaks me out. I called the medical people, and I have an appointment to get it seen in a month. Or I wake up early and call tomorrow, and it's all a lottery whether they can see me or not. It's probably my lymph nodes. Or a cyst that has formed from an ingrown hair. Sis says I should probably invest in Nads, or some other waxing stuff because Me + Shaving + Lazy Shaving Techniques = lovely lady lumps. I feel freakish with my lump--as if I have three nipples or a third eye, or fluorescent yellow skin. I feel self-conscious about exposing my right armpit when I stretch or hold my arm out in public if I wear a tanktop. The weather has been so warm that wearing anything else feels bizarre. Maybe I should paint the lump bright red, because then it becomes a bit exciting if anyone sees it. But that probably would look obscene.

I cooked for...what felt like 7 hours, when it was only 3. I made about 7 lbs. of pork and chicken adobo. I was struggling to keep the kitchen clean and the sink empty of soiled things, but it's hard when you are cooking something that is damn labor intensive, and sauce is always bubbling everywhere. Chopping destroyed my already bloodless right hand, and handling raw meat and meat bones always gives my hands millions of miniscule incisions that sting when I soak the meat in marinade. Then there is browning the meat in the wok, then having it stew in it's sauce on the stove. We had Brian join us for dinner, and he and sis said a lot of nice things about how it turned out. *phew* When the food was finally cooked, I felt such an intense wave of exhaustion pass through my body. I wonder how real chefs do this all the time.

I listened to Ricky Gervais' podcast as I cooked. It's very funny, although I found Ricky a bit harsh in his attacks on Karl Pilkington--who has become inadvertedly the star of the show. Karl is an absolute genius. All his ideas are a lovely blend of mundane, bizarre, illogical, and profound. Stephen Merchant was also on--I could listen to his lovely stories all day. He is quite the storyteller. Comedians are the best. They point out their own flaws before you can, attack themselves mercilessly, and affectively make their strange aspects endearing. At least that is how it is with Stephen with his freakish height (6'7"), beanpole figure, and "bulbous eyes" (as he has described himself). Stephen's character of Darren Lamb in "Extras" is one of my favorites in the show. He exploits his own physicality until he is the funniest-looking creature you've ever seen. The thing is, when you see this guy in interviews he's actually a dapper fellow. How beautiful to be so unafraid of one's flaws as to exploit them, and laugh first...